Fw: You might be a goth if you find this funny...

[idlechic]

dunno if this is the same one you're looking for, christy, and i'm pretty
sure it's not the one with boo's additions, but it's a start.  and anyone
who hasn't seen it might like to...

> YOU MIGHT BE A GOTH IF:
>
> 1.  You pay 6 bucks for cigarettes that match your outfit
> 2.  You wear sunglasses in the produce department at night
> 3.  You won't get in a fight because it might smudge your make up
> 4.  You wake up still drunk at 3 in the afternoon with anonymous black
> lipstick on your face
> 5.  People can't tell whether you're searching for a missing contact or
> dancing
> 6.  The only day you feel normal is Halloween
> 7.  You don't know whether the person you're sleeping with is male or
> female until you're actually in bed with them
> 8.  You don't care
> 9.  The shade of powder you wear is called "Sheet Of Paper"
> 10.  You were rooting for the vampires in "From Dusk Til Dawn", "Lost
> Boys", etc.
> 11.  The Count was your favorite Sesame Street character as a child
> 12.  You watch Sesame Street as an adult just to see The Count
> 13.  You wear long, velvet coats in the middle of summer
> 14.  You go to Denny's at 5 in the morning and think, "These are my
> people"
> 15.  You think dead flowers are prettier than live ones
> 16.  You think anything dead is pretty
> 17.  You refer to your age in mortal years
> 18.  You give yourself the honorary title of Lord or Lady
> 19.  You know what a Malkavian is
> 20.  You know what a Malkavian is because you've been there, done that
> 21.  You have the t-shirt
> 22.  You dressed as The Crow for Halloween one year
> 23.  You have dressed as The Crow for Halloween the past few years
> 24.  The club you frequent has concocted an original drink called "The
> Vampire's Kiss"
> 25.  You buy $15 fishnets and rip them on purpose
> 26.  You think blood is "pretty"
> 27.  Your combat boots cost more than it takes to feed a third world
> child for two years
> 28.  You've willingly undergone cosmetic dental surgery
> 29.  You own 16 or more Cleopatra c.d.'s
> 30.  You own even 1 Projekt c.d.
> 31.  Friday the Thirteenth is your lucky day
> 32.  You can't decide whether Morticia Addams or Lily Munster is
> prettier
> 33.  You decide Wednesday blows them both away
> 34.  You could easily blow $500 in a Halloween store
> 35.  You could spend all $500 on just make up
> 36.  You were disappointed to find out that "American Gothic" is a
> portrait of two farmers
> 37.  You claim the Chupacabra is a friend/relative of yours
> 38.  You own a hearse
> 39.  You own a hearse and don't work in a funeral parlor
> 40.  You keep a coffin in the back as "decoration"
> 41.  You keep a coffin in the back as a bed
> 42.  You think of the hearse as the "family car"
> 43.  You think heresy is a religion
> 44.  You claim heresy as YOUR religion
> 45.  You own a rosary that you wear
> 46.  You own many rosaries that you wear
> 47.  You own a glow-in-the-dark rosary that alternates between your neck
> and
> the rearview mirror in your car
> 48.  You fashion your eyeliner after a culture that's been dead over
> 2000 years
> 49.  You wish to name your first born Lestat
> 50.  You plan to name your first born after ANY Anne Rice character
> 51.  You didn't know they were characters
> 52.  Your purse is large, square and metal
> 53.  The purse has scratches from being used in a fight
> 54.  It has scratches from being kicked on the dance floor
> 55.  This is the reason it was scratched in a fight
> 56.  You think bats are "cute"
> 57.  You argue on whether Poppy Z. Brite or Anne Rice has the more
> realistic view on vampires
> 58.  You can debate both sides of that argument
> 59.  You've participated in one of those "Do you think Tom Cruise was
> good as Lestat?" conversations
> 60.  You've started one of those conversations
> 61.  You saw Valor on the street, you would throw your large, metal
> purse at him
> 62.  You and your friends enjoy congregating in a local graveyard
> 63.  No one you know is buried there
> 64.  You and your friends take lengthy drives to visit non-local
> graveyards
> 65.  You take pictures of the gravestones while reciting Oscar Wylde or
> singing "Cemetry Gates" by The Smiths
> 66.  You know the words to "Cemetry Gates" by The Smiths
> 67.  You know who The Smiths are
> 68.  Your favorite poem is "The Raven" by Edgar Allen Poe
> 69.  Your favorite poem is "Metamorphosis of a Vampire" by Charles
> Baudelaire
> 70.  You spell Vampire either Vampyre or Vamphyre
> 71.  Your boyfriend complains that his ribs just don't stick out the way
> they used to
> 72.  Your girlfriend complains that you look better in her black, velvet
> skirt than she does
> 73.  You refer to others as "The Normals"
> 74.  You refer to our leather-clad brethren as "Those Industrialites" or
> "Industrial-heads"
> 75.  You go to South Beach, but have never seen the ocean
> 76.  You can reminisce through all 4 locations of The Kitchen Club and 2
> of The Church
> 77.  You put on The Wake and practice dancing in front of the mirror
> 78.  You practice with your own personal strobe AND blacklight
> 79.  You are too poor to afford either and stole the lights off the
> Christmas tree
> 80.  You can't even tell whether you're looking for a missing contact or
> dancing
> 81.  You are happy when no one has ever heard of your favorite band
> 82.  When someone else "discovers" you're favorite band, you find
> another favorite band
> 83.  Christians accost you with pamphlets on the street frequently
> 84.  Jehovah's Witnesses accost you with pamphlets on the street
> frequently
> 85.  You accost Christians with pamphlets on the street
> 86.  Satanists just look at you and smile
> 87.  You laugh hysterically during those Church Of Latter-Day Saints
> commercials
> 88.  You call for the free Bible anyway
> 89.  You take great pleasure in vandalizing said Bible after waiting
> impatiently by your mailbox for 4-6 weeks
> 90.  You stop vandalizing the Bible momentarily to look up Psalm 69
> 91.  In your honest opinion, the image of Jesus ruins the beauty and
> natural fluidity of the cross
> 92.  You've been with your significant other for over a year and still
> wonder what they look like without make up
> 93.  You and your boyfriend fight over make up
> 94.  You decide to get matching his/hers make up caddies to separate
> your make up
> 95.  You smudge your lipstick on purpose to look like Robert Smith
> 96.  You eat those limited edition pop-tarts just because they have bats
> on them
> 97.  You save them because Hey!...they're limited edition
> 98.  You call them goth-tarts
> 99.  You know what Renfield's Disease is
> 100.  You have Renfield's Disease
> 101.  You have taken anything on this list personally
> 102.  You were offended
>
> Copyright 8-97
> Shana Tims and Erica Garcia
>